The 19th Hole

20 years ago I had a boyfriend who played golf. My mother used to buy him christmas presents of useless golfing "executive" gifts - like ball scrubbers - but we managed to stop that after a couple of years. I went once or twice with him to the practice swinging hitting place - whatever it is called - and took a few swipes. My impatience quickly overcame my desire to learn.

But just because I know nothing about golf doesn't stop me from posting about it. After all, Wayne Swan knows nothing about budgeting and that doesn't stop him.

"Every golfer will get a climate change support payment of $850 to buy extra sunblock cream"

I do know there is the odd Australian Zontian who enjoys a round of golf, and so I hypothetically imagined that they asked me "If we were to go to Orlando, are there courses on which we can play?"

Answer: Just a few - there are over 170 courses in the area

If there is one thing Florida is famous for, it is golf. And so let's play a short 9 with the USA's most famous golf ambassador: Bob Hope.

“I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, ‘What do I do next?’ Pat replied, ‘Wait till the pain dies down.’”

In Orlando there are famous designer championship courses, golf course hotel resorts, little private courses, country clubs and public courses.

Grand Cyprus: Considered the best course in Orlando - well 4 courses really! North, East, South and New!

“My only regret is that they don’t have an intensive care unit in the Eisenhower Medical Center for my golf game.”

It's all finely mown grass, raked sand and Florida Slash Pine as far as the eye can see

The Reserve at Orange Lake Resort:

“Bing was an excellent player, with the slowest backswing I’ve ever seen. While he was taking the club back you could fit him for a tailored suit.”

I don't know what you want to know, but I do know that within Walt Disney World there are five golf courses.

Disney's Magnolia Course. Don't tell me you weren't expecting these sandtraps:

“That reminds me of Sammy Davis (Jr.). Sammy hits a nice ball, about 90 yards. But his jewellery flies 110.”

You can have lessons with a pro, shop for those special polo shirts golfers wear, drive around in the little carts and of course relax in the club house. All the things that I imagine golfers do.  But then again I imagine that Disney food has no calories and pixie dust is sprinkled in every resort room.

“It’s fun playing with Dean Martin. Dean doesn’t drink liquor anymore. He drinks Windex. He gets an awful hangover but his eyes are so clear…I’ve seen Deano send a ball over 250 yards…just by breathing on it.”

Disney's Old Key West Resort is built around Disney's Lake Buena Vista course. You could tee off straight from your balcony:

“Arnold Palmer …He’s the biggest crowd pleaser since the invention of portable sanitary facilities… He’s won as much money as I’ve spent on lessons.”

I don't know in what else you golfers are interested? Perhaps to see the courses in action?

Visit Florida has a couple of videos. This first one shows Rosen Shingle Creek and Grand Cyprus

“I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.”

Here's a couple of minutes of golfing at WDW:

 "If President Eisenhower slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about."

Hmmm .... that brings me back to where I opened - I wonder if Wayne Swan slices when he plays golf?

Oh - and remember to take that extra sunblock you'll be buying with your climate change bonus. Orlando in June is hotter than ..... well .... let's keep it polite and say the outback in summer.

for my friend Marg - keep swinging!

all photos and videos from the official websites of each course

This blog post is part of the DisMarks Disney Blog Carnival! Check out more fantastic Disney websites and articles over at the Carnival.